When Failing is an Option
Anxiety will really dick with you and take away your options to grow. For much of my life it has felt like the stakes were just too high to actually take chances even small ones. If I failed at something my anxiety wouldn’t let me forget it and it would haunt me and reply in my mind repeatedly. It would serve as a mocking reminder of how worthless I am and how everyone is better and more worthy than I am. Doesn’t matter that none of that is true. Anxiety creates a false reality around you a ’la The Truman Show. What matters is that it is overwhelming and persistent. Anxiety is like a clockwork system that someone has spilled molasses into. The gears cannot turn like they should and it becomes slow or stops altogether at times. When you know that failing at something, even something small will create so much pain and dig you further into the pit of self-hatred and you know that you won’t be able to climb out you stop taking that risk. Failing is no longer an option for you it is th...
